There are so many good people out there.

I am starting to feel a bit more refreshed.  Still sleeping a large amount of the time but I think that will go on for a while.  I am, however, trying to get plenty of exercise preferably with other people.

Yesterday, I joined six other people and went for a walk in the rain with the Parkinson's club and we finished with a coffee and chat in a cafe.

This morning there were occasional showers and, after doing some clearing in the garden and filling the wheelie bin I walked up to Kamo Village to buy a birthday card and had a long chat with a friend I happened to meet.

I got home just in time before the rain and wind started in earnest .  We are getting the tail end of the cyclone that hit Fiji and the forecast is not good for tomorrow either.

I have had such wonderful support - yesterday I had calls from the Nurse at the Hospital who did M.'s assessment and the lady who runs our Alzheimer's support group both to see how I was coping.

I had also been in touch with the Starship Foundation about a function they have here in Whangarei next week.  I had not replied to their invitation  as I wasn't sure whether I would be able to attend.  Thinking that it would be good for me to mix with others I sent an email explaining the situation and asking whether it was too late to go on the list of attendees.  Marilyn took the time to phone me and tell me that I was most welcome also giving me support as she had been in a similar situation. (Starship is the Children's Hospital in Auckland that caters for the whole country).

Last night, Jean from All Points of the Compass phoned to offer her support.  On top of this I have had lots of phone calls from friends and family.

I know it is going to be hard when I visit M. as he is just not able to understand the fact that it was getting too much for me and will, most likely, accuse me of all sorts of things but I will phone the Rest Home tomorrow and ask their advice as to when I should visit.

I had intended to take some photos of the garden when I returned from my walk but the rain put paid to that. Never mind there is always another day.

A whole new way of life

It is hard to believe that it is five days since I took M. to the Rest Home.  I went in again on the following day as his room looked so bare with empty picture hooks on the walls so I made up a cork board with photos on it and also took in some watercolours that were still packed up following our move.

At reception I was told that he is telling everyone that I am overseas having taken all his money and am  having an affair    Sounds far too exhausting to me.  He was in the corridor when I went in and he told me that I have to get him out of there.  Not a good start and I was beginning to wish I hadn't gone in although I was pleased that I made his room look better.  (This constant fight between being rational and knowing I couldn't cope any more and the guilt feeling).

On Friday the Alzheimer's club picked him up for the day (they will do this for four days - 1 or 2 a week) to help with the transition.  Unfortunately, when he went to move from a chair to the window seat which was higher he slipped and hit his ear.  A lot of blood and bruising but when the nurse from the Home phoned she said it was nothing to worry about and, at least, it is them dealing with it and not me.  I will leave it for another week before I go back to see him.  This is what is suggested to help him settle and should be better for both of us (I hope).

For myself, I have been getting wonderful nights' sleep and sleeping in late (which is unusual for me) as well as having afternoon naps - or rather falling asleep when I put my feet up for a read.

On Wednesday I was too tired to go to the gym and just went for a short walk.  Thursday, a friend took me for my diabetic eye check as I had to have a driver.  We then went to visit a friend in hospital and to a cafe for lunch.

I also received the papers I need to sign for the financial side of things.  I was having trouble with it on Thursday night as they seemed to need papers that had vanished in our move so I got everything I could together and went in to the office of "Work and Income" on Friday.  The lady I saw was wonderful and I think it is all sorted - I hope to hear some time next week.

On Saturday, I just went for a walk up to Kamo shops and to the library and chatted to friends on the way back.  I bought a bacon hock for some soup, some of the butcher's wonderful bacon offcuts which are end piece of ham mainly.  I also bought some gluten free products, falafel mix, millet cereal which is a nice change to the oat porridge that I usually start the day with and buckwheat pancake mix.  I made the pancake mix up for afternoon tea and they were so delicious with butter and jam that I ate far too many, having already had some falafel for lunch.  At least I should be putting some weight back on.  (I can see me overdoing it and then having trouble losing it).

Today, I have been to the gym class that I used to attend when I was still able to either leave M. or take him with me.  It was great to catch up with everyone.  We put our clocks back last night so it gets light an hour earlier now.

Tomorrow, I will go on a walk with the Parkinson's group.  I am trying to get out with people as much as possible so that it doesn't give me time to worry about how M. is doing.

The cats, Kath and Kim are great company and I wake up to find one, or both, of them alongside me and, of course, if I go out in the garden they are always there.

The weather hasn't been too bad but it is starting to get colder hence the bacon hock.

I am feeling a lot more relaxed but a lot will depend on how M. settles in especially when he realises it is not just for a fortnight's respite.

Rest Home Care

The day has finally arrived when I have had to put my lovely husband into full time care.

He has been in the Respite Scheme for a few months and this involved 2 weeks in a Rest Home and 6 weeks at home with me but it has got to the stage where I needed it the other way around.

A couple of weeks ago I went to the Kamo Home and Village to see whether they had a vacancy and have a look at the facilities.  It is not as modern as where he was for respite but I have only heard good things about the care that is given there.  Originally I was told that there was a waiting list but after visiting I was told that someone was moving to Hospital level care and M. was able to have that bed.  It was only yesterday that I heard he could go in today.

He has actually deteriorated in the last fortnight and I have had some sleepless nights when he has had hallucinations or been up wanting middle of the night showers etc.  I have also not been able to leave him at all. On Friday I went into the garden for a few minutes and returned to find our new television lying on its back - it had been pulled off the table.  He didn't seem to know what he had done and, luckily, the t.v. still goes.

Only this morning, when he seemed quite good, I left the breakfast table for a minute only to return and discover he had reached across and taken my pills as well as his own.  Luckily, the G.P. says they won't do any harm.

All of this doesn't make it any easier and it was the hardest decision I have ever made.  He thinks he is still in the Respite Scheme and only going in for two weeks although, when we got to the door of the home he said "You are leaving me aren't you!!".

My only hope now is that he settles in and I am able to take him out for drives and possibly bring him home.

Anyway, after some very wet weather we have a lovely sunny day today.

Now I just need a lot of sleep and will have to go to the Social Security to find out how much I will get to live on as his Superannuation will go towards his Rest Home charges.

I know that things will eventually sort themselves out and I am lucky in that the family all support me.

Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive.

Whangarei Garden Discovery

I have just had a fortnight's respite while M. was in a rest home and went down to stay with friends on the North Shore in Auckland.  It was great to be able to relax and also catch up with other Auckland friends.

I stayed with my friend, Gill, and she came back with me and we spent three days visiting gardens on what is called the Whangarei Garden Discovery.

Below are some of the flowers from these gardens.
                                         
                                           
                                           
                                           

Monarch Butterflies Update Again

Yesterday, two more Monarch's came out of their chrysalis (hatched doesn't seem the right word but I am sure someone will tell me what is).

These were both outside and when I noticed them in the afternoon one was in distress on the ground.  I lifted it up and put it on a leaf - on checking later I noticed a Praying Mantis on it.  On further investigation I discovered it only had one leg.

I despatched it to end its' suffering (assuming butterflies do suffer) and have realised that the Mantis did the damage.

This morning there was one more butterfly that had emerged - I left it for a short while and when I went back a Praying Mantis was close by so I removed the leaf complete with butterfly and put it on the outside table.  It has since flown away.

I think there are another four chrysalises (could be more) so will watch them carefully.  I have always rescued any Praying Mantis that has been in the wrong place but, in future, they will be disposed of.

It is a cruel, hard world out there.

Whangarei Growers' Market and Firewood

On our previous 5 acre property we had a good vegetable garden - this is a small part of it with the citrus orchard in the background.  We grew a large variety of vegies.

Here in Kamo, on the outskirts of Whangarei, I only have a very small area.  At present there are some leeks, onions, lettuce, brocolli, silver beet (swiss kale) and  climbing beans that are yet to flower.

Anyway, yesterday morning we went to the Whangarei Growers Market.  I really only went for the sweetcorn and garlic.  I blanch the corn and then remove it from the cobs before freezing it in cupful lots to use over winter.

This is what I came home with  (actually a lot less than usual).

 I  had eight cobs of corn - I always buy it from the same stall and it is picked the previous evening.  The other four cobs were blanching.  The eggs are free range pullet eggs.  I got the corn blanched and frozen. I find that eight are the maximum I like to do at one time so hope to get back next weekend for some more.

Later in the day the 2 cubic metres of firewood I had ordered was delivered and I got it stacked while cooking our evening meal.  I am very much an amateur at wood stacking but it feels secure.  This is most of it but some went elsewhere as I didn't want to overdo the stack.

I also managed to get some weeding done and was very pleased with my day's work.  A bit quieter today although I have done more weeding and almost filled the wheelie bin as well as done some baking.

Getting ready to fly away

This morning on checking the chrysalis I discovered a still very wrinkled butterfly getting ready to unfold its wings.  The photo of this looks very blurred - I expect I should have had my trusty Kodak on a different setting as the butterfly was shaking.

I have taken a few photos during the afternoon the last as it was opening and closing its wings and looking as though it was getting ready for flight.  I have reluctantly put it outside, reluctantly because there is quite a cool breeze blowing.

Isn't it beautiful.